Five Things to Do when Life Doesn't Go the Way it Should

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Sometimes life doesn't go to plan. It could be an accident, an illness, termination of employment or marriage breakup; the list goes on and on. When life doesn't do what we want it to do, it is easy to become discouraged, worried or depressed. It is easy to feel that God has overlooked us. We may have a season of uncertainty ahead as a result of the curve ball. The gap between illness and health, unemployment and employment or any other period of time where we are left 'dangling.' and it can be hard, particularly for those of us who like to have every thing planned out. Unfortunately it doesn't take long for us to realise that life does not always play to our rules.

So what do we do in these times? How do we garner peace and confidence in the face of uncertainty and unpleasant experiences?

1. Know that God is in the Circumstance

One of the difficult aspects of challenging times is the temptation to believe that God is not present. That He has turned His back in allowing this difficulty to come upon us. The reality is, that God has clearly told us in His word that He will never, ever leave us or forsake us. He has also assured us that all things, no matter how difficult or unpleasant, can work deep,positive change in us if we submit to His perspective on what has happened. One of the privileges of being a child of God is the certainty that He is present and that He extends His hand to help us out of whatever pit or trial has overtaken us.

2. Stop asking 'Why?'

This is the most natural question for us to ask when something doesn't go as planned, however, many things don't make sense in the moment. It is often not until time has passed that we can look back and see the gold that God was working in the darkness. Asking 'why?' can alienate us from the lesson of the trial. Instead of asking 'why', ask 'Lord, what are you teaching me?' I guarantee, He will answer in a most tender and encouraging and sometimes challenging way. And not only that, often as time passes and we grow from the situation, our eyes are opened and we see the why. Not always, but often.

3. Wait for Yahweh

The Bible frequently speaks of the power of waiting on God. It is the deliberate positioning of ourselves (our mental decision) to give the situation to God and to choose to believe that He is, and will continue, to work the situation for our good. This is the position of peace. It is not passive or depressive. It is not resignation in the sense that we give in and expect nothing. Rather, it is the confident and hopeful expectation that God will act on our behalf.
Psalm 27:13 and 14 tell us to wait for and have confident expectation in God.
The Names of God version of the Bible translates these verses as:

'I believe that I will see the goodness of Yahweh in this world of the living. 

Wait with hope for Yahweh. Be strong and let your heart be courageous. 

Yes, wait with hope for Yahweh.'

In this particular version I want to draw your attention to two things. Firstly, the decision we must make to believe that we will see good things once more. Some challenges seem to go on forever. Or roll one after the other. We need to remind ourselves that this too, will pass. God still has good things prepared for us. This will keep us mentally strong and spiritually secure as we wait. The second reason I have chosen this translation is because it uses the Hebrew name for God, Yahweh. This name was considered so sacred by the Israelites that they wouldn't even use it verbally. The name Yahweh embodied all the strength and power and fearfulness of the God who had done mighty things in their midst, which brings me to my next point.

4. Replace Unhealthy fear with Godly fear

Often uncertainty can be a breeding ground for fear. When we do not know what is on the horizon, our mind can fill the blanks with scary what-ifs. Godly fear is often misunderstood, and yet correct fear of the Lord is a wonderful antidote to ungodly fear. It is as we recognise the greatness of Gd, His supremacy over circumstances and diagnosis and all power, that we are filled with an awe. We recognise that nothing is too difficult for Him. that nothing can hinder his work in our lives. We lift our eyes from the circumstances to a God who stands greater, above and beyond in every way.

As Christians we have the blessing and confidence of being able to draw near to God, but we need to be aware that our familiarity with the Lord doesn't cause us to underestimate His strength. We serve the same God who rides the clouds, who sends fire and hail, whose voice splits cedars and sends the deer into labour. He is a mighty force and He has promised to act strong on our behalf. Be encouraged! The God of the universe moves for you! He will draw you up from the waters that threaten to consume you.(Psalm 18)

5. Choose Faith

At our core, we want to know everything. We want answers to all our questions and doubts. We don't want to have to wait or be in a position of uncertainty. That would allow us to bypass the discomfort of trusting. God says in His word that His children live by faith in the Living God. We don't have faith in a code of conduct or a dead text (the Bible) but a living, breathing God who sees the beginning from the end. We might be surprised by our circumstance, but He is not. He saw it coming and will work it for our good. Not only that, God communicates with and draws close to His children through the deliberate enactment of our faith. It's what we have been called to. A life of confident expectation in the goodness of God. This, the Lord rewards. This, the Lord blesses with His very Presence.

Don't despair, no matter how dark the circumstance right now. The fullness of God is available to you now. Draw close. Wait on the Lord!