The Whisper: a mini-post, an invitation

There is something about the Biblical story of Elijah that strikes a chord deep within...coming down from an incredible display of supernatural and dynamic breakthrough, the prophet - a man like us, the Bible tells us - is suddenly overwhelmed at a threat decreed by one of his enemies: 

Jezebel sent out a threat, a desire to tear him from limb to limb for what he had done to her kingdom of false gods. This woman, although powerful, was no match for the God who had been operating on Elijah's behalf... still, he is overwhelmed. He is tired. He has forgotten the miraculous and is drawn into the deep pit of reality; of present dangers and unfavorable circumstances; of threat and death and failure. 

The man flees to the desert and is fed by an angel. For several days he sleeps. He is weak. Vulnerable. Depleted.... finally Elijah awakes and is met by the Lord who tucks him into a cleft in a rock and promises to show Himself. 

First comes a mighty wind with a deafening roar; then the earth breaks open. Finally flames tear past with radiant heat. And then, at last a break.... the sound of something small. 

Quiet. 

Certain. 

It is a gentle whisper and this is God.... 

It's a gentle whisper kind of evening and I am called away to a desert, a rock, to feed on the food of heaven and hear the quiet assurance of a gentle whisper... join me?

The Family Room

It's been eight months since I have written for this blog. I've avoided it. Missed it. Been relieved to see the back of it. All of those things. To say that life gets complex is an understatement - well, life between my ears, that is. This thing, called my brain, is a troublesome thing. It quickly turns an act of love into a labour of perfectionism. It creates a corner of the world that is supposed to be a place to breathe ; both for myself and for visitors...and it turns it into a formal lounge room. You know what a formal lounge room is, right? They're not so common where I live, in middle class working suburbia. My experience of a formal lounge room comes right out of the nineties:

When I was in my teens, my mother cleaned a home for a few years, to bring in a little extra money. I occasionally accompanied her; helping to do some of the tasks and she would reimburse me for my 'part' of the job. Mostly I remember the toilets (ick), vacuuming the upstairs bedroom and the bookshelves, where I would sometimes get distracted by enticing reads such as 'How to win friends and influence people' and a book whose title I forget, which was lamenting the loss of femininity in a modern world. The writer - a male - suggested that women had even lost touch with the art of brushing their hair. How a woman's hair today was, flat, dull and lifeless. His remedy was an old one; he suggested female readers ought to tip their heads upside down and stroke in 100 slow, deliberate movements from the nape of the neck to the tip using a natural bristle brush. But back to the lounge room.

At the front of the modern and sparse two story home that my mother and I cleaned, was a large, narrow room with a front-facing window. The room was pristine. It contained a formal lounge suite and a formal dining table. A fireplace, which looked untouched. A crystal vase or two and a generic picture on the wall. Every week, the room was spotless, clearly unused, and I was always taken with the waste of it.

All that perfection, no one to use it.

My blog, became a formal lounge: in my head at least. A place where only the best china belonged; only the most intelligent and eloquent thoughts; only the most innovative ideas that no one else was writing. My inner perfectionist loves to take the reigns of my life as it sees fit.
I'm learning to beat it into submission.
Realising that I don't always have to be the best (I can't)
the most polished (too much work)
or the most intelligent (how exhausting!)
so I'm reclaiming my blog as a family room.

Stains on the pillows, half-eaten snacks on scratched, ikea plates. The television might be blaring on a station no one is interested in watching.
And that's fine.
That's family life.

And that's what this is all about: creating space for life. For thoughts. For imperfection.
See, no matter how much I avoided this place, I couldn't stop the writing spilling out of me. It poured out in Instagram and on Facebook. In free-writes on my computer and in my bullet journal.

I'm made to pour out.

It's how I process life.

I stopped the process for awhile because I was afraid to be vulnerable.
Afraid for you to see my pillows. Afraid for the criticism I might receive.
Afraid that I might see for myself what a mess I am.

Now, I'm saying no to fear.

This is me and this is my corner of the world. My take on God. My online journal. It's a work in progress and so am I.

Put on your comfy pants - the ones with elastic in the waist - and join me on a new and comfy journey.

Here's to 2017!

the vulnerability of being honest

image source: freeimages/CherylEmpey

Have you ever taken the risk of making yourself vulnerable to another person?

Maybe you decided to confide in someone about something that was troubling you; a problem or an addiction or a negative feeling that no one seemed to share. Perhaps you told a close friend that you struggle to connect with your kids or maybe you are getting too close to someone other than your spouse. Most of us, at some point in our lives, have made ourselves vulnerable by being honest with someone we felt we could trust.
It takes courage.
It often deepens our relationships and enables us to grow stronger and kinder toward ourselves and others.

And sometimes...
It goes really pear-shaped.

That's because vulnerability (aka honesty) makes you vulnerable. (I know, it's ironic, right?)

Who you choose to be honest with determines the quality of the interchange. Is it going to be a positive experience? Is it going to alleviate your self-doubts? Thrust you in a positive direction? Will it deepen the relationship or will you be left out to dry?

There have been times in my life when I have opened up to people who I thought I could trust. At times it has gone well, at other times, I have been left feeling more embarrassed, ashamed or awkward, wishing I had never said anything at all. Opening ourselves up to the wrong type of people or opening up to the right person at the wrong time can leave us feeling worse than before we started. I want to provide some tips that I have learned along the way (usually by trial and error) about how to be vulnerable without losing a piece of yourself.

1. Your Stories are Precious
It may or may not come as a surprise to know that not everyone deserves your vulnerability. When we open up, we allow others to look inside of us. We are giving a piece of ourselves away. Is the person we are sharing with trustworthy? Will they be able to see past our behaviours/addictions/problems and still love us for who we are without being put off by our 'messy bits'? Who you choose to be honest with is vital. Value yourself enough to choose someone who will value you right back.

2. Don't Force Intimacy
Friendship takes time. Over-sharing can impede what could be a good friendship. Some people are naturally over-sharers. I used to be on the generous side of the spectrum when it came to opening up to those around me. With time I have learned to hold some things close. To judge the quality of the relationship before trying to move it to the next level. Be wise. Sometimes honesty brings us closer to those around us, sometimes it is too much too soon. Take your time. Don't rush a friendship.

3. Sharing is like a Tennis Match
Sometimes I like to think of friendship as a bit of a tennis match. You know you're watching a really good game when the ball goes back and forth, back and forth, back and forth in a long and evenly-matched rally. Is the friend you are wanting to talk to likely to share with you also? Or will it be a one-sided affair? If someone is holding back on themselves, it might be wise to choose someone else or to wait. Some people won't reciprocate your authenticity. The reasons vary; they may simply be more naturally cautious and private, they may prefer to keep their friendships at arm's length or worse case scenario, they may be working hard to keep up a fascade. The worst thing you can do is to open up to someone who will use you weaknesses against you. We are all human. Not everyone wants to admit that fact. Unfortunately, some people will use your vulnerability to make themselves feel better.

What to do if there's No one

Blogs, Books and Podcasts
During certain seasons of my life, there have been times when I have found books, blogs and podcasts to be a helpful way to receive the validation I am needing. There are a multitude of resources out there to assure you that you are not alone; that life is hard and that there is always someone who can relate to what you are experiencing. If you are going through a season where there is no one you feel you can connect with, these types of resources can be really useful.

A Counselor
Paying someone to listen is a surefire way to ensure that your secrets will stay that way! Counseling can be really helpful when you need a sounding board, an action plan or simply need someone in your corner. Choosing the right counselor is important. Find someone you feel comfortable with. If the rapport isn't there after a couple of sessions, try finding someone else. Counselors are people too and not all personality types work together. Give it a chance, but if it's not working, shop around.

Ask
God knows what we need and when we need it. He Himself has said it is not good for us to be alone and tells us to meet together with others who know Him. Ask Him for a good, positive friend or mentor. You may need to take steps; perhaps engaging in a community; whether it is attending church or a small group; a mother's group, ladies group, craft group etc. You might need to make yourself available. Again, shop around! Some community groups are more supportive than others, but just remember, God has created you for connection. He won't leave you without the support you need.

And of course, God Himself!
By putting God last I am in no way indicating that He is our last resort, however, sometimes we need physical solutions or 'God with skin on' as I like to think of it (I have no idea where I read that line but it stuck with me over the years). When Jesus left the earth He promised His disciples that He would not leave them as orphans but that He would send someone to dwell with them forever: the Holy Spirit or the Spirit of Truth. He is referred to as the Counselor, the Comforter, the Advocate who will lead us and guide us and remind us of Christ's teaching. Likewise, we are told to cast our cares upon God because He cares for us.

People may let us down, but God never will.
Others may judge us or use our vulnerabilities against us but God assures us in John 6:37:

'All that My Father gives Me will come to Me; and the one who comes to Me 
I will most certainly not cast out (I will never, never reject anyone who follows me).'

are you stuck?

image source: freeimages.com/Adrian, Canada

Have you ever been in a rut? Are you in one now? Do the circumstances of life keep beating you down; does the dialogue in your head accuse you of being weak and incapable to live the life you know God has invited you to live?

I have. Multiple times. It is easy in these times to make sweeping judgments about the goodness of God. We see the circumstances of our life (which seem merciless); we see the weakness in ourselves (how easily we can be thrown into doubt or fear or anger or defeat) and we wonder if we will ever bridge the gap between the life we are currently living and the life that we have envisioned. We start to feel that God is far away. That perhaps we got it wrong; He doesn't care or He is untouched by our difficulties. Maybe we heard wrong; maybe we are not going to be a pastor or an author or an interior designer (or whatever God has spoken into our hearts) after all. Life presses in, doubts grow, and we find ourselves stuck. Not moving forward, but walking wearily the treadmill of life, wondering how long before our legs give out and we give up all together. Were we wrong to hope, to dream? Is this what life really is all about? Are we destined to be tired, depressed and overwhelmed?

I offer a hearty 'no way!'

While it is true that in this life we will experience good times and hard times, we are not meant to stay stuck! Even the difficult times are there to move us forward. Depending on the difficulties of the circumstances we are are facing, it is easy to believe that we have no control. It is simply not true. When we made the decision to follow Christ, we entered into a relationship with God; we became His children and He committed Himself to lead us and guide us into maturity. He has promised to heal and help us. We often complain and moan and fear and doubt but God is willing to lead us just as soon as we ask. He will faithfully take us step by step; the problem is not His lack of guidance, but often our forgetfulness in asking Him or our unwillingness to follow.

Often times the path to freedom is a slow one. Sometimes it is instantaneous, but mostly it takes practice. It is this journey that binds us to God's father heart. It is in our 'stuck-ness' that we learn to reach out; to invite God back into our parenting, our thought life, our careers and relationships.

It is not nearly so tricky as we think it is; it just comes down to this:
Ask Him.
Sit, wait, see what He says.
He will show you the next step to take because He is faithful.
It is up to us whether we will take it.

'Trust God from the bottom of your heart;

Don't try to figure out everything on your own.

Listen for God's voice in everything you do, everywhere you go;

He's the one who will keep you on track.'

Proverbs 3:5 (The Message)

you can get help right now

image source: freeimages.com/Griszka Niewiadomski

Have you ever felt as though you were waiting for something to come to pass? Some solution, some outcome, some answer to a problem? Oftentimes when I have been in a situation I have not been happy with or that I could not seem to get peace on, I have looked to the future, thinking, when is the answer going to come? This line of thinking often left me feeling as though I was just hanging: waiting around for something: a solution, for help, for God to do something. And yet over this past twelve months, one of the truths I am beginning to slowly wrap my head around is the concept of God as a present help. God as I AM and not I will be.

In the Bible, God's names represent a different aspect of His character. When He revealed himself as I AM, God was not only communicating His eternal nature but His Presence and Sufficiency for any situation, for any point in our timeline. Many of our concerns can be traced to living outside of the now. We might look to the past and see failure, disappointment and patterns we think we can't break. We look to the future and may fear the unknown or worry that the past will continue on a loop there. Or we might be waiting for something to happen that we believe will solve all our problems.

But I AM is above and beyond this; He is everything at once. Everywhere at once. I AM was there in the past and will be in the future, but most importantly, He is here right now. He is fully accessible to us in the present tense. That means now. And one second from now. And one second after that. There is no past or present sin, problem, dilemma or wayward thought that can alienate us from Him. We are not depending on the passing of time or the happening of certain events to be ok in life. We don't need to keep projecting our solutions to the future. Our answer dwells in the Present.

One of the biggest blessings of the God-life is the accessibility of help in every moment and circumstance. God's power to transform us, to strengthen us and offer us hope and give us wisdom so that we can face whatever is going on around us. It's the reason the apostle Paul could find joy even when he was in a prison cell. We can get peace in any singular moment, regardless of what is happening in our lives. Our security and help are not dependent on circumstances, on the unfolding of time. That would be a tragedy. There is too much at stake. Too much outside of our control. We could spend a whole life waiting.

Instead, we are offered help now. Today. This second.

Don't get stuck in the time-trap, projecting your help to some future point. Slow down. Synchronise with the rhythm of God and see how He will show Himself strong for you, right now.

'Now that we know what we have - Jesus, this great High Priest
 with ready access to God - let's not let it slip through our fingers. 
We don't have a priest who is out of touch with our reality. 
He's been through weakness and testing, experienced it all - 
all but the sin. 

So let's walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. 

Take the mercy, accept the help.'

Hebrews 4:16 (The Message)

the antidote to worry

image source: freeimages.com/John Nyberg

There are just so many things to worry about in this life. We could fill a whole day with a multitude of anxious thoughts concerning ourselves, our loved ones, our plans, careers, relationships, the world. In fact, if we look around, it often seems that there is more going wrong with the world than going right. In addition to what's going on 'out there', we have our own issues to contend with: past failures, lost dreams and hopes, experiences that seemed to have crushed us and trained us into believing that we might as well give up. We can become stuck amidst this stream of negative thoughts, trapped between the failures of the past and the fears for the future.
When we are overrun with negative, worrisome thoughts, it can be easy to get stuck. To feel like passengers in our own minds as the stream of concerns run through like a freight train, weighted by our experiences, by 'proofs' that things could and will go terribly, terribly wrong.

But there is an antidote.

God has not created us to carry the weight of the world on our shoulders. Not even the weight of our own lives; He has provided a solution regarding those things which concern us. In Philippians 4:6 and 7 we find an invitation:

'Be anxious for nothing, but in everything buy prayer and supplication, 
with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; 
and the peace of God which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.'

Within this well-known passage, we are offered the correct application for our anxieties: Prayer. When we are worried, it is a sign; a sign that we are carrying a burden that we ought not to be carrying. God knows that worrying about things that are outside of our control is not good for us. It is not His design for His creatures to carry the weight of the world; to try and plan their futures and keep all the plates in the air by their own strength. Some things are just outside of our control and no matter how much we churn over them, we cannot come up with answers.

When we are overrun with worry, we are invited to hand over our concerns to God through prayer. We are not casting them to the great void and hoping for the best. We are handing the problems over to a Being, asking Him to work on them for us. He has promised to equip us with strength and ability for every task. He has promised solutions, deliverance and His presence. When we pray, we invite him into the circumstance and secure His solutions. It is passing the problem from our hands into His.

Prayer also works an act of purging our minds of those thoughts that do not belong there. As we release the thought and the control to God, we reestablish our minds; we detox the negative, fearful churning thoughts and are left with a blank slate. God has promised that when we pass our concerns to Him, he will give us His peace.

In the verse above, peace is defined as the following:

• a state of tranquility; exemption from the rage and havoc of war (remember, those things that concern us are not our battle to fight: God has promised to go ahead of us)
• security, safety, prosperity
• the tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ and so fearing nothing from God and content with its earthly lot of whatever sort it is

In addition to this, the word guard is likened to a military guard, which works to prevent hostile invasion or to keep the inhabitants of a besieged city from flight. It is a protection, a guarding, a keeping, a watching. When we pray, we release supernatural power; peace guards us but it is our job to stay in that peace. We need to be careful not to rehash a thought that we have released to God in prayer. Reject it; it has been committed to God's care and you can be assured that He will has taken responsibility for it.

This is God's design for his creation; communication with him. Re-aligning ourselves into His care and reminding ourselves that we are not meant to figure this life out by ourselves. He wants to show us the way and He wants to help us in our lives.

This is the fourth installment on a series of fear that I will be doing on this blog. Check back in the coming days for more on fear and how to take back control of a worried, fretting mind.

*For those who want facebook updates on my latest posts, you can find me at One Pilgrim's Journey

observe don't accept

image source: freeimages.com/Gerla Brakkee

Too many of us are quick to accept a thing without thinking it through, without really asking, ‘is this true?’ My husband made a comment today about hearing that toasted muesli is not as healthy for you as untoasted muesli (which I think is true, incidentally), but when I asked him why it was healthier, he couldn’t tell me. He said, 'it has something to do with the fats'. Then he joked, 'but it was from a reliable source', to which I replied, 'yeah, if it was on the internet it must be true.'

We are a generation who are inundated with messages on a daily basis. Within a mouse click we are invited to learn and there is an abundance of evidence both for and against almost any topic we could imagine. We need to be aware that just because we hear a message (even on a grand scale) it does not make that message true.

For a long time, I believed that my thoughts were accurate measures of reality. If the thought was in my head, I would assume it was true. When I would think something like, ‘you know such-and-such could happen’, I would go into agreement with that thought, without even questioning it. The result? I would react emotionally, getting upset and convinced that that thing would come to pass. Most people seem to have a good grip on getting bossy with their thoughts but some of us struggle. I didn't challenge my thoughts, if I saw any grain of truth or possibility in them, I accepted them and with them, the negative emotions of fear, worry and doubt.

God is showing me that we do not need to receive the messages that come into our minds, via our thoughts. It might sound obvious and it's certainly not a new notion, but I don’t think we realise just how much real estate we give on a daily basis to thoughts that are just plain wrong. When we feed these unchallenged thoughts, they grow.

The enemy is a bully and he seeks to expand his territory in our minds. He does it through intimidation, persistence and often reasonings or imaginations (which feel real). In my last post, I spoke of the reality that the enemy has no real power over us, but when we accept his thoughts without challenging them, we allow his fearful lies to bed down and become part of us. He doesn’t have any power without our permission, but if we take his words and allow them to be truth for us, then we will live out of fear, or pride, or anger or whatever else he is trying to put on us. Then our actions reap fruit. In that way, he gains real estate and can gain it vastly.

Just think, if David had not challenged Goliath, but instead accepted his threats as truth (let's face it, the odds were definitely in Goliath's favour), then the whole territory of the Philistines would have continued to be inhabited by the enemy. The children of God would not have possessed what was rightly theirs.

No matter what territory the enemy has taken in our lives through his intimidation tactics, his imaginings or his persistent attack on the mind, we do not need to fear. God has given us the tools to take back what the enemy has stolen in regards to our peace, our health and our state of minds.

Slow Down

We need to observe the messages we are being told. Slow down and ask, is this true?
Hold it up to the mirror of God's word and if it doesn't match, ditch it! It doesn't matter if it feels true, looks true, smells true or sends your knees knocking together. (In fact the very reason it terrifies you is because it is un-truth or half-truth. Truth is a Person and He sets you free). This is the power we have. The power to separate ourselves from the thought. To observe it. And then to choose: accept or reject?

It will take courage. It will often mean defying reason, imaginations, experiences and the pull of our emotions, but these have never been measures of truth, so don't be fooled. Learn by those men and women of old who stood on the Word of God. Who took it literally and bravely, forsaking all else. God never forsakes those who rely on Him and the more we practice it, the stronger we will grow.

Truth is ours. Peace is ours.

Let's walk in it.

‘With the Lord’s authority I say this: Live no longer as the Gentiles do, 
for they are hopelessly confused. Their minds are full of darkness… 

But that isn’t what you learned about Christ.  
Since you have heard about Jesus and have learned the truth that comes from him, 
throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, 
which is corrupted by lust and deception. 

Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. 

Put on your new nature, created to be like God—
truly righteous and holy.’

Ephesians 4:17, 20-24

This is the third installment on a series of fear that I will be doing on this blog. Check back in the coming days for more on fear and how to take back control of a worried, fretting mind.

*For those who want facebook updates on my latest posts, you can find me at One Pilgrim's Journey

fear is an empty threat

image source: freeimages.com/Matt Williams

'You have feared continually every day because of the fury of the oppressor, when he has prepared to destroy.

And where is the fury of the oppressor?'

Isaiah 51:13b

One of the first secrets that I discovered in regards to the stronghold of fear I had in my life was this:

As children of God, the enemy has no actual power over us.

His power lies in one place, one tactic, one approach; Lies. He reverses truth and uses it to emotionally and mentally crush us. But it only works if we buy into his lies. You see, fear thrives on the possibility of something terrible happening. It is all smoke and mirrors. The enemy does not have the control over our life that we think he does. He simply scares us into thinking he has control and the reason his suggestions are SO terrifying are because they are exactly the OPPOSITE of truth. They are fueled by the belief that we may somehow escape the mercy and protection of God (which is impossible) and fall into the hands of the enemy.

Because of this knowledge, we can learn to take fear very lightly. It is not a vessel of truth.

It is an empty threat.

Just like Goliath.

God had promised the children of Israel that they would possess the land that He had appointed for them. They were to fight the Philistines and take command of the land that God had set aside for them, knowing that they would be victorious in battle.

Goliath, however, put fear in the hearts of the Isrealites. He expressively paraded and taunted the army of Israel every day for forty days, breaking into their confidence and making them tremble in their sandals and doubt the Living God, who was actually in charge. Who actually had full control of the situation and had promised them protection and success.

But the Isrealites couldn't see past Goliath. They were tricked into thinking that their future was in his hands. That he would crush them and nullify the promises of God on their life. 1 Samuel 17:10 tells us that 'when Saul and all Israel heard these words of the Philistine, they were dismayed and greatly afraid.'

When we feel afraid or dismayed we can be sure that somewhere, at some point, we have fallen for a lie.

The Israelites spent forty days in paralysis, being tormented by Goliath's daily parade. Their fear was the result of engaging with Goliath's lie.

It took a fresh, young man (inexperienced in battle) to put the situation into perspective. David recognised that Goliath was a toothless bully whose threats were empty. And as such, David was not afraid. He could trust wholeheartedly in the knowledge that the Lord would knock Goliath on the head. The fact that Goliath crashed under the weight of a simple pebble is testimony to the fact that God was in complete control of the entire situation. Nothing and no one could prevail against His will. Too bad the whole army didn't realise that. They could have saved themselves forty days of anguish.

We too, can take a lesson from this. The only way the enemy can hurt us is by getting into our head, convincing us that we need to fear him. When we mull over his empty threats, we engage in doubt and circular thinking and become fearful, miserable and confused. We forget the good news of who we are! Children of a living God! Children whom God is protecting and perfecting and working all things together for good.

Fear will only get you if you engage in it. When we find ourselves feeling afraid we need to recognise that somewhere, somehow there is a false belief at work: a Goliath trying to steal our peace.

Our battle plan is simple.

Recognise that the enemy has no actual power over us. It doesn’t matter how big Goliath is, how noisy, relentless or intimidating. He can be safely dismissed. You don't buy his charade any more. Instead, silence him with truth. You are safe. Protected. Loved by God. And growing stronger every day,

'For whatever is born of God overcomes the world. 

And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith.' 

1 John 5:4

This is the second installment on a series of fear that I will be doing on this blog. Check back in the coming days for more on fear and how to take back control of a worried, fretting mind.

*For those who want Facebook updates on my latest posts, you can find me at One Pilgrim's Journey

to those who are afraid

image source: freeimages.com/Randall Hop

My mother and I both struggle with fear. It's a family thing. A habitual thing. A stronghold thing. I didn't realise how much fear was threaded into my way of doing life until I met my husband. My husband (and his family, too, for that matter) are not at all fearful people. Fear is just not a factor in their lives. For me? Fear interferes with a lot of my decisions, affects the way I view myself and the world and often keeps me in a place of torment, wondering at all the 'what-ifs' that could befall me. So far, it has been 'my thing'.

You know, we all have them.

Thankfully, God is committed to my care.
Slowly, I am being delivered from fear. So is my mum.
Together, we are realising some things about fear and I thought I would pass them on to benefit those of you who struggle with fearful thoughts, too. In the coming posts I am going to share some thoughts on how to deal with fear and worry in our lives.

Fear is a powerful emotion, but it is not something that needs to dominate us. The emotion of fear carries a very specific purpose and is designed to take up only a very small place in our life: fear is very useful for when we find ourselves in a dangerous situation. If we are chased by a lion, we want to feel afraid. Fear sharpens our bodies, sends adrenaline to our systems and enables us to run or fight or hide when we are in danger.

The emotion of fear, however, is not designed for every day life.

Out of context, fear cripples us. If we perceive danger in our daily life (for example, we are worried that bad things might happen to those we love, or we worry what people are thinking of us or if we are going to succeed at the things we have been called to do) we are not going to live our best lives. Instead, we are going to be uptight, fighting for control and unable to enter the rest that God intends for His people.

We were not created for fear. We were made for love. For confidence. For productivity.
God is committed to bringing each of us to a personal place of freedom and revelation knowledge so that we no longer live lives of fear.

Be encouraged, because this seeming-giant in your life does not have the power you think it does. You can overcome your worries. You can learn to recognise fear for what it is: lying messages designed to rob you of your peace. And you can take back control of your life and live as God intended you to live: free.

This is the first installment on a series of fear that I will be doing on this blog. Check back in the coming days for more on fear and how to take back control of a worried, fretting mind.

The Power of the Pause

As I write, I am sitting in the café section of McDonalds, surrounded by the sounds of orders being placed and picked up, milk steaming and swirling and the low, incessant mumble of patrons conversing in booths by the back wall. Every now and then a shrill beep is emitted into the air which is already buzzing with noise…It is the alert that an order is ready. The young man behind the counter calls in a loud voice, ‘order 129…’ or ‘order 130…’ or failing that, ‘the skinny soy latte and banana bread?’

And in this low, droning environment (interspersed with moments of chaos) I have decided to write on the power of silence.

Or more specifically, the power of the pause.

So what is the difference between silence and a pause?

Silence is the lack of sound and movement. Silence is an external condition that allows us to experience inner stillness. We run to the Mountains and the rivers and pitch our tents in the back of Burke. We mothers might climb into our wardrobes or our children’s cubbies or our showers for that blissful state of silence. The problem with silence is that it is dependent on all our externals lining up and therefore it is not always attainable when we need it.

While silence helps us to cultivate inner stillness, it is not the pause.

So what then, is the pause?

The pause is the inner stillness.

The pause is where we step away from the man-made world and into what I will call the real world. The world where actual life exists and truth resides quietly, untouched by the chaos. A pause is not a mystical experience or an emotional or sentimental state of being. It is a re-connection with what we already know. Or a gentle easing into we need to know. In the pause, we touch life the way our Creator intended it and everything within us finds alignment. We can breathe and re-orientate ourselves.

The busier we are, the easier it is to lose touch with the pause and start marching to the rhythm of the man-made world, our goals and the demands of life, often without thought or organisation. We simply respond and react and as such we can find ourselves on a path we have not deliberately chosen. We become a twig in a current, thinking we have control, but in reality we are responding to the external influences and not commandeering our lives from a deep sense of still.

Because pause is an internal state, it is independent of the external state of silence. The pause can take place amidst the chaos, untouched by the externals. The pause, practiced regularly, can become a way of life. When we live out of a sense of pause, we notice the person who God might want us to smile at today. We see the couple pushing a pram under a sunny Summer sky and remember that life is changing, that our children are growing, that family is a blessing. We hear the whisper of God saying from behind, ‘go this way’ or ‘go that.’

Life become slower and more purposeful; we can accomplish what we need to do without reacting to the demands in frenetic bursts of unconstrained activity, but rather we respond to life in controlled, peaceful and deliberate movements. We live out of quiet rather than responding to noise.

Silence is wonderful but the pause is powerful. It can be taken with us. Practiced. Listened to. Even in a McDonald’s café :)

Take on the power of the pause. Practice it and cherish it. Life is found within it. 

Five Things to Do when Life Doesn't Go the Way it Should

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Sometimes life doesn't go to plan. It could be an accident, an illness, termination of employment or marriage breakup; the list goes on and on. When life doesn't do what we want it to do, it is easy to become discouraged, worried or depressed. It is easy to feel that God has overlooked us. We may have a season of uncertainty ahead as a result of the curve ball. The gap between illness and health, unemployment and employment or any other period of time where we are left 'dangling.' and it can be hard, particularly for those of us who like to have every thing planned out. Unfortunately it doesn't take long for us to realise that life does not always play to our rules.

So what do we do in these times? How do we garner peace and confidence in the face of uncertainty and unpleasant experiences?

1. Know that God is in the Circumstance

One of the difficult aspects of challenging times is the temptation to believe that God is not present. That He has turned His back in allowing this difficulty to come upon us. The reality is, that God has clearly told us in His word that He will never, ever leave us or forsake us. He has also assured us that all things, no matter how difficult or unpleasant, can work deep,positive change in us if we submit to His perspective on what has happened. One of the privileges of being a child of God is the certainty that He is present and that He extends His hand to help us out of whatever pit or trial has overtaken us.

2. Stop asking 'Why?'

This is the most natural question for us to ask when something doesn't go as planned, however, many things don't make sense in the moment. It is often not until time has passed that we can look back and see the gold that God was working in the darkness. Asking 'why?' can alienate us from the lesson of the trial. Instead of asking 'why', ask 'Lord, what are you teaching me?' I guarantee, He will answer in a most tender and encouraging and sometimes challenging way. And not only that, often as time passes and we grow from the situation, our eyes are opened and we see the why. Not always, but often.

3. Wait for Yahweh

The Bible frequently speaks of the power of waiting on God. It is the deliberate positioning of ourselves (our mental decision) to give the situation to God and to choose to believe that He is, and will continue, to work the situation for our good. This is the position of peace. It is not passive or depressive. It is not resignation in the sense that we give in and expect nothing. Rather, it is the confident and hopeful expectation that God will act on our behalf.
Psalm 27:13 and 14 tell us to wait for and have confident expectation in God.
The Names of God version of the Bible translates these verses as:

'I believe that I will see the goodness of Yahweh in this world of the living. 

Wait with hope for Yahweh. Be strong and let your heart be courageous. 

Yes, wait with hope for Yahweh.'

In this particular version I want to draw your attention to two things. Firstly, the decision we must make to believe that we will see good things once more. Some challenges seem to go on forever. Or roll one after the other. We need to remind ourselves that this too, will pass. God still has good things prepared for us. This will keep us mentally strong and spiritually secure as we wait. The second reason I have chosen this translation is because it uses the Hebrew name for God, Yahweh. This name was considered so sacred by the Israelites that they wouldn't even use it verbally. The name Yahweh embodied all the strength and power and fearfulness of the God who had done mighty things in their midst, which brings me to my next point.

4. Replace Unhealthy fear with Godly fear

Often uncertainty can be a breeding ground for fear. When we do not know what is on the horizon, our mind can fill the blanks with scary what-ifs. Godly fear is often misunderstood, and yet correct fear of the Lord is a wonderful antidote to ungodly fear. It is as we recognise the greatness of Gd, His supremacy over circumstances and diagnosis and all power, that we are filled with an awe. We recognise that nothing is too difficult for Him. that nothing can hinder his work in our lives. We lift our eyes from the circumstances to a God who stands greater, above and beyond in every way.

As Christians we have the blessing and confidence of being able to draw near to God, but we need to be aware that our familiarity with the Lord doesn't cause us to underestimate His strength. We serve the same God who rides the clouds, who sends fire and hail, whose voice splits cedars and sends the deer into labour. He is a mighty force and He has promised to act strong on our behalf. Be encouraged! The God of the universe moves for you! He will draw you up from the waters that threaten to consume you.(Psalm 18)

5. Choose Faith

At our core, we want to know everything. We want answers to all our questions and doubts. We don't want to have to wait or be in a position of uncertainty. That would allow us to bypass the discomfort of trusting. God says in His word that His children live by faith in the Living God. We don't have faith in a code of conduct or a dead text (the Bible) but a living, breathing God who sees the beginning from the end. We might be surprised by our circumstance, but He is not. He saw it coming and will work it for our good. Not only that, God communicates with and draws close to His children through the deliberate enactment of our faith. It's what we have been called to. A life of confident expectation in the goodness of God. This, the Lord rewards. This, the Lord blesses with His very Presence.

Don't despair, no matter how dark the circumstance right now. The fullness of God is available to you now. Draw close. Wait on the Lord!

God's Word to You

I write a lot on this blog about casting down thoughts 

which stand against what God tells us to be true. 

So that leaves us with the question, what is true for the children of God? 

The following are God's words, from His bible to us. 

Take them, be blessed by them, and rest confidently in them 

because they are His promises to you.

Will you trust that your name is inscribed on the palm of My hand, that I could no sooner forget you than a mother could forget the child nursing at her breast? Will you believe that your just claim has come before my ears and that because I hear you, you have what you have asked for? Will you trust that My loving kindness and tender mercies are new every morning, that they will follow you all the days of your life, in every place that your foot shall tread or your wing shall take flight, even to the furthest depths of the sea? In trouble and persecution and nakedness and strife, My love will follow you and even the darkness shall be light about you.

I will deliver you from every snare and every trouble. I will strengthen you with My strength. I will perfect you. I will restore health to you, spirit, soul and body. Will you believe that the day of the righteous - and that means you, child - shines brighter and brighter to the coming day? That you not only have a future and a hope but that My grace is sufficient for your today, for your every trouble and trial? My healing and restoration redeems your yesterday and My strength secures your tomorrow?

You were set apart from your mother's womb, called to be My child, to walk in the works that I called forth for you at the beginning of time. The risen Christ dwells in you to strengthen you and to manifest His glory in your life. You no longer have to answer to sin and fear and sickness; you have been redeemed from the curse of the Law and now answer to a new master, not a slave driver or a task master, but an Abba father, and I am touched with the feelings of your infirmities. You hear My voice because you are the sheep of My pasture and the child of My hand. I have put My spirit in your heart: the Comforter, the Healer, the Counselor who will never leave you or forsake you. He will remind you of all that Christ has done and will do for you. He will remind you that Christ in you, is the hope of glory.

Child, I am committed to your care. I will lead you gently for My yoke is easy and you will learn from My light, un-burdensome and gentle ways. I hedge you both behind and in front and I have wrapped My arms around you. You are nestled between my shoulders, gathered in my arms as a mother hen gathers her little ones. I sing over you with tender mercies and I restore you with songs of deliverance. I teach you when to rest and when to walk. I know when you are weary and I make you lie down in peace. I give you sleep. I restore and refresh your soul, anointing your head with oil and preparing a table for you in the presence of your enemies. I invite you to eat at My table both now and forever.

I have trampled the serpent and all power now belongs to Me. I am the name above every name, power, throne, kingdom, dominion, illness and diagnosis. I have given you My authority to use. I have given you My mind so that you may refute every work and lie of the enemy. No weapon formed against you will prosper, even the gates of hell cannot prevail against you for I have established you. I have set all things beneath your feet.

You are seated in the heavenlies with Christ and all that is His, I give to you. I have blessed you with every spiritual blessing. There is not a day where I will not be with you. I will provide your every need from now until the end of time. My grace is sufficient for you and My strength is perfected in your weakness. All I ask is that you believe. That you trust in me and feed on My faithfulness. I will not, will not, will not fail you. I will not, will not, will not, forsake you. Not ever. I cannot for You are mine and I ransomed My life so that you may live.

I bled for your forgiveness. I cast your sins behind you, removing them from you. As far as the east is from the west, that is how far your wrongdoings are from you. I look at you and see only Christ. You are clothed in My righteousness, clean in my sight, accepted in My family. There is nothing that you can do that will remove My love for you. I bore your sickness so that you could be healed. I became sin so that you could become righteous. I have prepared a home for you in heaven and here you will spend eternity in My presence. I will bless you. I will restore you. I will do the work.

Enter My rest, child, for it has all been done. It is finished. And nothing in heaven or earth can prevent, subdue or undo what I have done. My word cannot return to Me void. What I set to do is accomplished and complete. And I give it to you. Take it by faith, for it is yours and you are Christ's and Christ is mine.

You never need to fear again.

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Journeying with our Doubts

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For the longest time, I used to think that 'faith' was something that naive people clung to in an attempt to ignore reality. When people would tell me that they were trusting God even though they didn't have the answers, I would think, there goes another simple-minded person who is ignoring logic, rationale and progressive thought.

If something in my own life seemed to indicate that God didn't care, that He wasn't who He said He was, I would become convinced that those circumstances and the resulting line of thought had discounted the validity of God's goodness. I saw those niggles of uncertainty as signposts that I was falling for a lie: the Bible couldn't be taken literally. God was not ready to act on my behalf and He didn't really care.

In reality, those thoughts were just doubts.

I struggled with doubts about myself, about God and His word, about life and those around me. At times, I called my doubt 'critical thinking' and was certain that I had found holes in the faith and in what God had said in His word. Don't get me wrong. I was a Christian. I believed in God. I believed in the Bible. But I believed it only up until the point that I could get my head around it. Which would be fine, if I always had a clear grasp on things and was smarter than God. But, I wasn't.

I'm still not.

At first I thought I was in control. I thought that I was structuring my universe and that my critical thinking and the 'instinctive' interpretation of my circumstances would point me to truth and wholeness. Instead, I found that the more real estate I gave these interpretations, the more unsettled and confused I became. The harder it became to believe anything that God said and eventually, all I could hear was fear. I wasn't sure what I believed any more. So I ran. From church and what I had been told and from God. Thankfully, God is a chaser. But the period in my life was dramatic to say the least, a wild navigation into what I actually believed, and at that stage, it wasn't much. I knew God was real. That was a no-brainer. I sensed that He loved me (although I couldn't correlate it with the things I had experienced in my life), but I couldn't go much further than that. As I sifted through all I had been told, all I had been taught, I became an empty slate. I railed against God and I couldn't stomach anything with a remotely 'christian' message. I was up to my eyeballs in teaching and needed truth.

It was a long process. One marked with real transparency as I peeled back the layers of who I was and what I believed. In that experience, God met me and I was blown away by who He actually was, as opposed to who I had thought or been taught He was. The doubts had chewed away the crud. They chewed away some of the good stuff, too, but God restored it.

Out of that (necessary) experience, I learned a vital truth: I learned to recognise that doubts are just doubts; they are not truth. My doubts couldn't discount God's reality, no matter how elaborate, how deeply grounded or how legitimate those doubts felt to me. God either is or He isn't. And if He exists, then He is who He says He is. I can trust it.

So how do we handle our doubts? Do we stuff them all into a box and deny their existence, their legitimacy?

No. We are all on a necessary journey. A journey for truth and God will meet it. But there is an approach that we can take that is healthy and positive and one that will bring more confusion and fear.

In the book of Hosea, God lamented that the Israelites did not 'direct their deeds toward Him' (Hosea 5:4) but instead, turned from Him and looked to their idols for answers. When we see the word 'idols' in the Bible we often think of wooden totems and fail to see the relevancy to our current society, but an idol is anything that we allow to speak to us in such a way that it negates what God has said to be true, be it a painful experience, a popular opinion or intellectual thought. A person.

As I was reading this scripture, I felt the Lord saying; there is nothing wrong with having doubts. It is okay to question, to be scared or confused or angry or lost. God does not disapprove of the raw emotions of His children any more than I disapprove when my children communicate their hurts, questions or complaints about things that happen to them. God met me in my pain. The problem sets in when we use our doubts to distance ourselves from God rather than taking (or directing) them to Him. Don't get me wrong, God pursues, but we can avoid a lot of the pain by taking our issues to God, rather than running with them.

Raw emotion and doubt are part of the human condition. We can expect them, as God does. But when we give our doubts control; when we make the decision that they will be our litmus, our measure for truth, we have alienated ourselves from reality. God exists and He loves, whether we can wrap our mortal minds around it or not.

Know your teams.
Doubt isn't truth.
Doubt is just doubt.

Our Moods are Not the Litmus for Truth

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Our moods are not always accurate measures of reality. We have those days when things seem too hard. Life seems to roll over us wave after wave and its easy to feel that things will never be ok. In that moment, we can lose our hope and when we lose our hope, the day becomes that much harder.

On hard days, we might tell ourselves things like, 'things are never going to get better.' 'I won't be able to find the solution to what I'm facing.' 'I can't do this.' 'I just can't cope.' These messages, repeated over and over in our minds weaken us. We believe they are true and our emotions respond accordingly. We feel depressed. Pessimistic. Anxious. Overwhelmed. From this position, our circumstances seem even more bleak. It's an understandable cycle and an easy habit to get into. But are our emotions an accurate measure of reality? Just because I am feeling overwhelmed and out of solutions today does that mean that I really will not find a solution? That I will be perpetually stuck in the middle of the problem I am facing?

If one thing is certain in life, it is change. Nothing last forever. For God's children, we have the promise that when we cry out, God hears us and delivers us out of all our troubles. Not only that, but we have the assurance that all things are working for our good. The trials we are finding so difficult can be pillars of strength, forging faith and confidence within us as we press into God and trust Him.

And how do we do this?

We have to teach ourselves how to think. We must hold each thought up to the truth of what God says. If the thought or emotion conflicts with something that God has revealed to you, you need to reject it and replace it with His truth. This is what God talks of when He tells us to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. Following God's advice to reject those negative, depressing and untruthful thoughts and replacing them with His comforting, hopeful ones is the fastest way to mental health and emotional stability. His truths are a splint for your minds and your emotions. But it takes practice. What we choose to think on will feed our emotions. Choose good food.

Here are some of the promises of God that can encourage you on hard days. Use them. Choose them. Believe them. Bring to memory those times when God has come through for you. Meditate on them and let their truth uplift you. It will be life to your body and health to your bones.


- God hears you when you cry out and promises to bring you out of all your troubles (Psalm 34:17)

- Goodness and mercy will follow you all the days of your life (Psalm 23:6)

- God is going to work all things together for your good, even the hard things (Romans 8:28)

- God is moved with compassion by the difficulties you are facing (Psalm 112:4)

- You are growing strong by that which comes against you: growing in perseverance, character and hope (Romans 5:3,4)

- He will strengthen you as you wait on Him (Isaiah 40:31)

These encouraging truths are just scratching the tip of the iceberg of all the promises of God toward us. Try doing a keyword search in a Bible website like this one. Are you feeling hopeless? Do a search on hope and see what God has to say. Are you sick? Search for healing and see the Lord's opinion on it. Train yourselves to these truths. Be encouraged by the hope that lies in them. These are your measure of reality, not your emotions, and by them, you will grow strong, able to face the challenges that come your way.

Peace Beyond the Pain: the Brain's Ability to Heal Itself

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'My soul still remembers and sinks within me...' Lamentations 3:20 

We have a small part of our brain called the hypothalamus. This part of our brain is where all our most difficult, scarring and traumatising memories are stored and I have spoken briefly of it before. When we have been through something painful, the physical residence of this memory is the hypothalamus.

It used to be a belief that our brains were fixed. Those with mental disabilities, illnesses or those who had experienced traumas were believed to be permanently scarred, affected or doomed to the chemical changes that these events or illnesses had marked on their brains. Of course, the Bible never bought into this, but always offered hope with the instruction, 'be transformed by the renewing of your mind.'

In recent years, scientists have made groundbreaking discoveries about the plasticity of the brain. That is, the understanding that the brain is not actually fixed but is moldable, malleable and wired to return to health. There are a number of books out there outlining these encouraging scientific breakthroughs (I would recommend The Brain That Changes Itself by Norman Doidge and Switch On Your Brain by Dr Caroline Leaf). These new findings offer hope to those with troubling pasts, emotional struggles and substantiate the Bible's assurance that personal, mental transformation is well within our grasp.

Amongst this emerging research is the new understanding that memories, too, are not fixed. Rather, they are malleable and subject to reinterpretation each time they are brought back to the conscious mind. This is significant for a number of reasons.

1. It offers hope for those scarred by trauma
2. It puts control back in our hands: we don't have to live and relive those most painful events
3. It confirms God's instruction to choose our thoughts carefully: we have the power to reinforce and re-traumatise ourselves by continuing to bring the painful memories to mind, or we can learn how to re-frame those memories in light of His love and receive God's healing *

In the verse from Lamentations above, we are given a hint at how the human mind operates.

Science recognises a thought as a cognitive event. A chemical impulse that marks a physical landscape on brain matter. In effect, we are continually shaping, inventing and reinventing ourselves based on what we choose to think, believe and meditate on. For those of us who struggle with negative emotional habits and thought patterns (depression, anxiety etc) we know all too well that the brain can reach a state of near perpetual negativity; a bias whereby we distort incoming data based on our pre-existing fears and disillusionment. Rather than seeing life for what it truly is, we distort it according to our fear, traumatic memories and subsequent pessimism. It can be a nasty habit and one that snowballs until our default setting seems to be misery.

Our Lamenting prophet demonstrates the pain that results from bringing back to mind those scarring events: as he recalls the pain of the past, his soul sinks within him. The more we bring to mind the negative events of our past; our perceived failings, our disillusionment, the darker and more depressed we will become.

But there is hope.

Neuroplasticity is God's proof that the redemption of the mind is scientific, tangible and attainable.
We can train ourselves back to peace.

The passage goes on to say:

'This I recall to mind, therefore I have hope. Through the Lord's mercies we are not consumed. Because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning.' vs. 21-23a

I want you to look closely at the sequence of mental events that take place in this passage. Following the recollection of the traumatic, afflicted memory, the writer's soul 'sinks within him.' As he moves to a new mental state, we witness the following:

1. Another recollection is brought to mind: the Lord's faithfulness

2. By switching his mind to the Lord and not the event, the prophet's soul goes from sinking to hopeful 

3. Although the writer has experienced something very painful and real, there is the promise of something new. Something steady, available every morning: the Lord's compassions.

In these verses we are given a snapshot of how we can go about dealing with our own painful thoughts. How we can actually move from pain into peace.

The Lord is gentle and kind. It is as we recognise and translate His character into our traumas that we begin to be free of them. It's not easy. Life has hurt. And it has seemed to prove His lack of care. His unwillingness to intercept on your behalf. Perhaps you were abused as a child. Or witnessed the death of a parent. Perhaps you have been labelled with a mental illness. You feel that God has abandoned you. 

Depending on the level of trauma you have endured, there may be what feels to be a unbridgeable rift between your pain and the belief that God is good. That's ok. Take your time. He will be gentle. He will bear with you. He can take your anger and your doubts. And He can show you where He was while you were suffering.

God has wired us for redemption and for healing. The brain's ability to change and heal itself has been scientifically proven. 

You can be healed. Your pain can be replaced with the knowledge of the Lord's great compassion, which fails not. And as you learn to replace the painful thoughts; to turn your mind onto the mercy of God, you will experience healing and reclaim mental territory that you thought was lost.

God is good. He is for us. And His compassions never fail.

* It is here that I want to make a firm distinction between the natural (and often painful) process of working through the past vs being tormented by the continual reenactment of those painful events outside of the setting of a supportive, guided framework. Many victims of abuse have been suppressed into silence and a pivotal part of their healing is calling back the memories and speaking out. This is a necessary part of the healing process and not what I am addressing here.

What if...

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I am very good at imagining scenarios.

As a writer, my mind can rapidly create a scenario and then go on to imagine the effects and all the possible outcomes should that scenario happen (you don't have to be a writer to possess this talent...many people are brilliant at this creative, imaginative work).

In my writing, this is beneficial; my characters usually have great depth and the scenarios that I create are believable and follow a logical path.

But in my everyday life? This skill is not so great.

I am still learning how to harness my creative mind; the way that I process and make sense of my world. It seems that my real life is a lot like the worlds I build in my novels; full of infinite possibility...everything is connected and anything could happen. I take the simple, everyday happenings to a global or infinite scale...that dizzy spell is possibly a brain tumor...that tuna casserole that I made - the one that tasted a bit different than normal - will probably keep my family up all night with food poisoning. I imagine ramifications and sometimes create solutions for (or freak out about) things that have not happened. May not happen. Probably won't happen.

So, sometimes, my life feels like a really, really bad story. Full of horrible potential.

What if...

As I was sitting down with my laptop this morning, I began to brainstorm a new type of what-if list and I thought I would share it with you today.

You see, the odd thing is, in all my imaginings, with all my creativity, I very rarely imagine good scenarios. It's always the bad ones that steal my brain cells and hijack my emotions. Because of this, you will quite often find me at varying points on the spectrum of stress; anywhere from niggling worry to all out fight-or-flight body-war. The mind is a powerful thing!

As I compiled this list, amidst a morning of mundane, tiring tasks, I began to take heart. I felt life course back through me once again. Because truth brings life. You can't encounter it and not change. The following 'scenarios' find their basis in Scripture. See if you can think of verses to confirm them.

What if... everything gets better?

What if... this difficulty (whatever that is) that I am facing is making me unbreakable?

What if... I am finding myself?

What if... I am going to help others?

What if... my friends love and value me in their lives, warts and all?

What if... I can't escape the goodness of God? What if it follows me forever?

What if... He will only allow what will make me strong?

What if... I don’t have to prove myself?

What if... everything that I value in my life (my family, my friends, my gifts and passions) were all actually free gifts of God and did not come about by any great effort on my part?

What if... I'm growing stronger daily?

What if... I'm allowed to feel bad (and I don’t need to fear it), I can just lean into it and God and let Him move me through in new and creative ways?

What if...I am actually a pretty cool person and my life is going to go quite well?

What if... God is good and He loves me?


If you are a what-if kind of person, try a different approach. Give yourself freedom to explore scenarios: good ones. See if it helps!

The Counter-Cultural Nature of Trust

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For a long time, I have been aware of my biggest battle in my Christian walk. Maybe it's something something you can relate to.
Trust.
The foundation of the faith.
We are supposed to take God for His word. To lean hard into it, in the face of adversity. In seeming contradiction. And yet, unfortunately, most times, when the going gets tough, I split.
I've been doing it ever since I was a little girl, when I thought I found my first flaw in the Bible. You see, I've always been an analyser, a thinker. Kinda smart. But not so smart that I know to trust God, period. Just smart enough to go, 'Ahah! God, I've found a loophole and I just can't get past it!'
(Not so smart at all, actually)

It's no wonder, given this attitude of mine, that I have struggled with anxiety.When you think that you can outsmart God, or that you have somehow out-thought Him, the result is pretty much guaranteed. You're gonna feel anxious. Maybe not immediately, but eventually. It's a pretty big call to think you've found error in the Creator of the Universe.

I'm thirty four years old and I am just beginning to grab with determination God's instruction to trust in Him with all my heart and lean not to my own understanding. It would have made my life a whole lot easier had I grabbed it by the horns twenty years ago. But I had my own journey to take.

Leaning not on our own understanding...
This instruction pretty much flies in the face of a progressive, post modern world.
Christians look pretty ignorant these days, by education standards. Casting our doubts into the hands of God can get us the label of 'ignorant', 'blind' or 'naive'.
Modern culture encourages us not to be wary of our understanding, but to use it as a navigational tool for truth.

How well is that working, do you think?
Six billion people each using their own understanding to navigate and interpret the complex, multi-faceted world of ethics, morality, and truth.

I've touched on post-modernism before and while I definitely engage with some of the issues the movement raises -- and consider myself an advocate for critical thinking -- there are times when we need to put our thinking on the altar. God offers a unique way to find truth, one that bypasses the mind and goes straight to the spirit.
Faith.

After all these years running in the circles of 'intelligent thinking' I have come back to my pretty simple, base foundation, which is:

God is good and I can trust Him.

It's blind trust.
It's basically stupidity.
And deliciously, ironically and counter-culturally it's the starting point for knowledge.

'...The statutes of the Lord are trustworthy, making wise the simple.'

Psalm 19:7b